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geekystudmuffinTitle: The Expansion of Two Natures, part one
Authors:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
innerslytherin and severity_softly
Pairing: Hotch/Rossi, and a little Hotch/Haley
Rating: PG for this part, NC-17 overall
Summary: When Aaron Hotchner is new to the BAU, he finds himself working closely with SSA David Rossi--one of the original founders of the department. As their relationship progresses, they realize what they have together is more than friendship...but circumstances keep them from having all that they knew they could have together. Years later, Dave has a second chance, just when Aaron needs a friend the most...
Word count: ~10,000 for this part, ~78,000 overall (NOT a WIP)
Notes: RP format. Mild AU, as we played fast and loose with Hotch's already screwy back story (especially in regards to his work history and the timeline of his marriage to Haley). If you find any glaring errors, feel free to point them out. :)
"Love is the expansion of two natures in such fashion that each include the other, each is enriched by the other." - Felix Adler
If you were to ask Aaron Hotchner, he might tell you that saying he knew he was right where he belonged the very moment he walked into the BAU was grossly romanticizing the point. There were worries and apprehensions with every new job, and Haley had hardly been happy with the idea of moving to Virginia or with Aaron leaving SWAT and the Bar Association for the FBI. Still, she'd agreed to join him there soon because she loved him, and she wanted him to be happy. And while Aaron didn't walk into the bullpen absolutely sure this was going to be where his heart would reside for the rest of his career, he had a pretty good inkling that was probably the case the moment he saved his victim.
"You did good work." Dave Rossi wasn't a man who was free with his praise, but he never stinted when he thought it was merited. And from the moment he'd met Aaron Hotchner, he'd been impressed with the man--for a lot of reasons, not just that he was gorgeous and eager. Aaron was passionate about right and wrong, and completely in love with the law. It was a beautiful thing, and his dedication to protecting people was impressive.
Dave dropped his bag on the desk he was now sharing with Aaron and Roy Conover and took the chair. Aaron was the 'rookie', he could stand for a few minutes.
"Thanks," Aaron said. He knew it was ridiculous to feel as good as he did, given the case they'd just come off of, but he knew he looked a little too pleased, even if he wasn't actually smiling. He tilted his head at Dave for a moment, and then dragged a chair over from another unoccupied desk. He knew the type of guy Dave was--even if the men he knew in his previous profession might not have been as crass as David Rossi could be sometimes--and he wasn't entirely sure he liked Dave very much yet, but he was willing to give this a try.
Dave smirked, amused. "Pretty satisfied with yourself, aren't you?" he teased. He shook his head. "Better hope they'll allow our profile as evidence in the courtroom. Not much precedent for that yet." He couldn't help trying to needle Aaron a little; he was so damn eager Dave was surprised the kid hadn't been labelled a 'blue flamer'. Still, he was also damn likeable for some reason.
Aaron arched an eyebrow--it wasn't so much that he was pleased with himself, as it was that it felt good to be on this side of the case--and shifted down in his seat a little. He inclined his head, his expression going a little more serious. "I think there's plenty of evidence to build a strong case, though I've heard Glatzer is already preparing to defend him, so whoever's prosecuting is going to have a battle." He shook his head. The case wasn't yet five hours old, and their unsub already had the best sleazebag attorney Aaron knew of.
Dave nodded. "That can be the frustrating part, catching the unsub while not screwing up the court case afterward." He stretched, then glanced at Aaron. "You called that pretty wife of yours to tell her we're back in town yet?"
Aaron laughed and shook his head. "No. Haley and I aren't married, actually. And she's still tying up loose ends at home before she makes the move." He was sure Dave had just assumed Aaron was already married, given his age. It wasn't something Aaron hadn't heard other people assume a million times over, especially given how long he'd been with Haley. "I'll call her when I get home."
"Not married yet? Someone else'll snap the girl up, especially with the hours you're going to be keeping from now on," Dave said. "Trust me on that," he added, thinking of his ex-wife Kay. She hadn't liked the hours he spent away from home, especially when the end of the Hoover era meant women were moving up in the FBI ranks. Too many pretty women at work, too many hours away from home, and Kay was suddenly spending a lot of time with her tennis coach. Dave hadn't contested the divorce, and she'd been nice enough to leave him the cat.
"For all intents and purposes, it's been a de facto marriage for years, even if Georgia doesn't recognize common law marriages." Aaron shifted and glanced at Dave. "I probably will." Haley wanted to get married anyway, in spite of knowing that Aaron had never been too keen on the idea, and he knew once she was here in Virginia, her insistence was only going to get worse.
Dave raised his eyebrows. "You don't sound exactly thrilled about it," he remarked. He glanced at his files, then at his watch. "Want to grab something to eat, since we've both got empty houses to go back to?"
Aaron shrugged. "Sure," he said, quick to let the topic of marriage drop. Honestly, he wanted to go home and shower, but it never hurt to be friendly, considering he'd be working with Dave now.
"There's a great little bar up north a little ways. I can't remember where you said you'd found a place, but if it isn't out of your way, the burgers are great." Dave could cook, but he didn't do it much. Didn't seem to be much point, since it was just him. Eating out was easier, anyway.
"No. No, it's not out of my way." Aaron was mildly surprised that Dave was offering to go to dinner with him. He heard many things about Agent Rossi already, and none of them were rave reviews of Dave's people skills.
Dave nodded and stood up. "Great. I'm definitely in need of a cold beer. Just follow me."
Dave liked to drive fast, but Aaron didn't seem to have any trouble keeping up. Not that Dave would admit to being impressed by something like that. He wasn't. Really.
When they were settled in a booth at the bar, he stretched his legs out, letting them brush Aaron's lightly. "So what does the Not-Mrs.-Hotchner think of your new career?" he asked.
Aaron shifted slightly at the touch to make room for Dave and shrugged. "She's not thrilled about moving. I don't think she's thrilled about the FBI either." He glanced at their waitress when she brought their beers, and nodded his thanks. "Then again, you're a lot less likely to get shot in the courtroom, so I can see her point."
"Not quite as rewarding to spend your life in the courtroom, either," Dave replied. He took a long sip of beer and mentally classified Aaron as 'mostly straight, but not hopeless'. "Does she have a career?"
Aaron shook his head in agreement, but didn't bother to tell Dave that was exactly the reason Aaron had gone into the FBI. "She's a teacher. High school," he said. "She's finishing out the rest of the semester before she makes the move."
"Makes sense. She must like kids. Got any plans to have some?" Rossi hadn't been ready for kids when Kay was. They might be nice, it was the sort of thing you did, getting married and having kids, but he wasn't sure if he ever wanted any of his own.
"She likes her job," Aaron said, and took a long sip of her beer. "Teenagers and children are a different beast, aren't they?"
"Sure," Dave said. The new guy had some things to learn about avoiding questions and working with profilers. Dave let it drop anyway. "Didn't have any with my first wife," he said. "I wasn't a very good husband. Too many hours away from home." The waitress came back with their food and he thanked her absently.
Aaron nodded, but he wasn't sure he liked the direction this conversation was taking. It felt a little like Dave was warning him about something. He took another drink and dug into his food. "Are you remarried?" Aaron hadn't seen a wedding ring or heard that Dave was married, but it was easier to ask that than address the topic at hand.
"Oh, eventually," Dave said. He shrugged. "There's a cute clerk upstairs, name's Doris. I'm not in any hurry, though." He took a bite of his burger, trying to think about how to get Aaron talking. It was an unspoken rule that you didn't ask about why people wanted to work on serial offenders. They all had reasons, and they were all private about those reasons. It didn't stop Dave from wondering. "So you were the lead prosecutor on that rape case a few years ago. Turner something?"
Hotch glanced up from his food to look at Dave, frowning slightly in thought. After a moment, he licked his lips and nodded. "Lona Turner, yes. The State vs. Sykes. Did you follow the case?" Somehow Hotch didn't think that was the case.
Dave shrugged again. "Read about it after the fact." He glanced over at Aaron. The truth was, he'd read up on his new partner the minute he'd heard rumors the kid might be recruited. "There was talk about you for State Attorney, maybe Attorney General someday. And then you chucked that and went to the Academy, did SWAT out in Seattle for a couple years."
Aaron looked back up at Dave, and after a moment he let a smile seep through his expression. "There was talk of that. It wasn't what I wanted." He shook his head. "You did your homework," he guessed, smiling, then took a bite of his food.
Dave grinned back. "Like to know what I'm getting myself into," he agreed. "Everyone pretty much agrees, you're a hotshot." He laughed. "Hotshot Hotchner."
Aaron laughed and sat back, watching Dave for a moment. David Rossi really wasn't the man Aaron had been expecting him to be. "Is that what they say?" he said, amused. And it wasn't that he didn't already know his reputation had preceded him, but he wasn't planning to ride on it. "I came to the BAU to do a job, not showboat. Aaron's fine."
Dave shook his head. "I didn't say I thought you were here to showboat. You're damn good at your job. And you did a good job on this case." He glanced at Aaron and took a drink of beer as he studied him. "I don't say that sort of thing lightly, Hotshot."
Aaron was still smiling softly. He nodded, not really sure what to say. "Thanks," he said, then paused. "It felt good." He sat there for another minute before he moved again to take another bite of his food, feeling oddly exposed for a moment. He cleared his throat and glanced up again, recovering. "I don't suppose I could veto the use of that nickname, can I?"
Dave laughed. "I'm not the only one who's heard it." He thought about that for a minute. "Can't veto it. Might be able to change it, though...Hotch." He grinned and nudged Aaron's leg under the table.
Aaron laughed, but his eyebrows lifted slightly at the nudge. That was entirely new, in a sense. You didn't exactly get chummy with colleagues when you were a prosecutor. He took another sip of his drink. "I can live with Hotch."
Dave grinned and turned his attention to his burger. He knew the guys he worked with; calling him Aaron wouldn't do anything to stop the Hotshot jokes. But shortening it to Hotch would catch on. And for whatever reason (Dave didn't inspect it too closely) he wanted to make things a little easier on Aaron Hotchner.
*****
To say that Dave Rossi and Haley Brooks hated each other from the moment they met wouldn't be entirely fair, but it was close. She was a pretty young woman, but from the first she seemed to dislike Dave simply because of what he represented--the FBI, the job that had taken Aaron from his successful career as a prosecutor and the promise of an eventual career in politics.
Dave, for his part, was polite and called her ma'am, and made a point to tell her that he'd heard how wonderful she was. In the back of his mind, though, he couldn't help remembering Aaron's apparent lack of excitement about the relationship. Haley had called the BAU and managed to get the number for the police department in Virginia where they were working a case. Dave was impressed that she'd got hold of them, but less impressed that she'd bothered when he found out she wanted Aaron to have lunch with her before she drove back down to Georgia for the week. Dave had invited himself along.
"Is it always like this?" she asked Dave at one point, when Aaron had excused himself to the restroom.
"Pretty much," Dave agreed. "But it's a lot better than it used to be. Few years ago one of our colleagues stretched himself so thin on his caseload that he collapsed in his hotel room. He was lucky to be travelling with a couple of guys."
Her eyes widened and he gave her a reassuring smile. "Don't worry, we won't work Hotch that hard."
She raised her eyebrows. "Hotch?"
Dave shrugged. "Once a nickname gets started, it never dies." He grinned, glancing over Haley's shoulder to see Aaron coming back. He always looked so serious in those dark suits of his, so business-like and reserved. Dave wondered how Haley saw him, if he was always that serious.
Aaron wasn't oblivious to the underpinnings of discord between his two lunch companions. Which was a bit of a shame, considering he was stuck trying to play mediator between the woman he loved and a man he had taken to so quickly upon joining the BAU. Of course, Haley wasn't making Aaron's life any easier at the moment, but Dave wasn't making this lunch any more comfortable either.
Aaron slid back into the booth and gave Haley a warm smile, but almost immediately wondered what Dave must have said because it was plain on her face that she was even less happy now than she had been when he'd left the table. He gave Dave a subtle look, then cleared his throat. "How do you like the school you'll be at?" he asked Haley, because turning the conversation back to her was the safest thing to do, and Dave had just been asking about her job before Aaron left anyway.
Haley smiled and curled her fingers around Aaron's hand. "Fine. Everyone there seems nice. Some of the curriculum requirements are different from Georgia schools, of course. But I'll get used to it. Dave says they're calling you Hotch now."
Aaron laughed softly and glanced at Dave. "Yeah. It was better than the alternative, trust me."
Dave grinned but didn't say anything. He was trying to figure out if Haley was being possessive of Aaron because Dave represented a job she hadn't wanted Aaron to take, or because she somehow knew he had designs on Aaron's affection.
"I'm just glad you had time to have lunch with me." She glanced at Dave, then back at Aaron. "It sounds like you're going to be working a lot."
"I would've thought prosecutors keep long hours, too," Dave remarked innocently.
"They do, but generally speaking, you're able to schedule it." Aaron shifted in his seat and turned his hand in Haley's, giving it a squeeze. He glanced at her. "It may not be as regular, but I'll make time," he said, then shrugged and hid his frown in his coffee cup, hoping he could keep that promise.
"Don't worry, we'll take good care of him for you," Dave said. He grinned and excused himself.
Haley turned to watch him walk to the restroom. "I don't like him."
"I've noticed," Aaron said immediately. "Why?" He had a feeling he knew the answer, and that she would avoid the truth.
She shrugged. "He's just...cocky. Sure of himself." She frowned at him. "Hotch?"
Aaron turned to look at her, and for a moment he wasn't sure what to say. He was starting to get a little upset, but he he reminded himself that this was all going to pass. It was just the stress of moving. It wasn't her fault. "Yes. Hotch." He forced himself not to ask why that bothered her too. He knew it was because it was apparent he was already fitting in at the BAU. "Since when is sure of yourself a bad thing?" He gave her hand another squeeze and tried on a lopsided, affectionate smile. "You've always liked it before."
Haley rolled her eyes. "I like it on you. It's sexy on you." She leaned up and kissed him quickly. "He's just--" She frowned and finally blurted, "He acts like he's entitled to part of you."
That actually surprised a laugh out of Hotch. "Haley, this isn't a competition. You have me, and this job isn't going to take that away," he assured, then leaned in and kissed her again. "It's going to be fine."
Haley was frowning at him when he pulled away. "If you're just going to laugh at me, maybe you should go back to work," she said.
Dave had been approaching the table again when he saw Hotch lean in and kiss Haley. He had a feeling this wasn't a good time to interrupt. He paused, then changed directions to go up to the front counter. "I was wondering if I could get three coffees to go," he said, and waited while they filled his order.
Aaron saw Dave coming back out of the corner of his eye, but didn't look away from Haley. "I'm not laughing at you," he said, his smile fading but not slipping off. "But I should go back to work anyway."
Dave slid back into his seat and placed the coffee cups in front of them. "I thought we could all use another cup for the road," he said, smiling at Haley. He wasn't sure he liked her--wasn't sure this relationship with her was really what Aaron wanted--but he was determined to be polite.
"Thanks," Aaron said, picking up his cup and slipping out of the booth. He didn't let go of Haley's hand. He just gave her a gentle tug and waited for her to follow.
Haley forced a smile. "That was nice," she said, following Aaron.
"It was very good to meet you," Dave said as they walked out. "Aaron talks about you a lot." He was looking forward to getting back to the case. He'd quickly gotten used to working with Aaron; they made a good team. It was unsettling to have Haley 'intruding' on their partnership.
"Likewise," Haley replied.
Aaron cleared his throat and gave Dave a little nod that said he'd meet Dave at the car. He turned and took Haley's other hand when Dave walked away. "I'll see you at home tonight," he murmured.
"No, you won't," she said. "Aaron, I'm going back to Georgia now. Did you listen to anything I said?"
Aaron grimaced and shook his head. "Sorry. Sorry. I know." It had slipped his mind after having to sit 'between' her and Dave all lunch. He kissed her again in a last ditch effort to make her feel better about this lunch. "I'll see you next Sunday, then."
Haley sighed and hugged him. "I love you, Aaron," she said, her voice quiet.
"I love you too," he said, then gave her a squeeze before releasing her with a smile. He waited for her to turn before he started towards the car Dave was waiting in, then he got inside and drew his seatbelt across himself, not saying anything.
Dave started the car and pulled out of the lot behind Haley. After a while he cleared his throat. "She's very pretty."
"Yes, she is." Aaron looked sideways at Dave, then turned back to the road. "What were you talking about while I was away from the table?"
Dave shrugged and kept his eyes on the road. "She just asked if the job is always like this, us on the road all this time and whatnot." He glanced at Aaron briefly. "I couldn't lie to her."
"I'm sure she appreciated your honesty," Aaron said, which was possibly a passive aggressive reply, but it slipped before Aaron could stop it. That didn't usually happen; he started to wonder when he'd gotten that comfortable with Dave.
Dave raised his eyebrows. "I seriously doubt she appreciated anything about me," he said. "I'm sorry for it; I always try to get along with my partner's wives." Oops, that little dig had sort of slipped out.
Aaron glanced at Dave, frowning. "She's just settling in." Great. And now he was making excuses. He held a sigh and looked back at the road.
Dave shrugged. "Hey, as long as you're happy, man." Of course, he wasn't a hundred percent convinced Aaron was happy, but he'd give it the benefit of the doubt for now.
"I am," Aaron said. He'd be happier if the people in his life could be happy for him, but that might have been asking too much in some cases.
Dave nodded. "Good. That's what matters. Just hang on to that happiness." It doesn't last.
The rest of the drive back to the police station was silent.
*****
Dave smiled at Doris as she joked about one of the SACs, but his gaze was drawn to Aaron, who was striding into the BAU bunker, a tense look on his face. This is getting bad, Dave told himself. Over the past few months, he'd gotten to the point where he was more concerned, more invested--more attracted--to Aaron than any of the cute girls who expressed interest. "Excuse me," he murmured, looking back at Doris and touching his fingers briefly to her shoulder. He smiled, but it was absent, his attention already caught by Aaron's odd entrance.
He headed for the desk they shared, unsurprised to find Aaron searching the desk for something.
"What's wrong?"
Aaron didn't look up. A case had just come up, one from a killer they'd all assumed disappeared. Aaron had done some consulting on the case with Gideon when he was a brand new agent, but no one had been able to find the guy before. The case had never officially been handed over to the BAU, however. Until now. They just had a brand new body in Michigan with the exact same MO.
Aaron found the case file that was buried under newer, more active investigations, and dropped it on the desk in front of Dave. "Grand Rapids Killer. There's a new body. That's what's wrong." He took the file back before Dave could even look at it and started thumbing through its contents.
"I didn't think that was an official case." Dave moved to stand behind Aaron and look over his shoulder at the file. He knew Aaron and Jason had done some consulting on it, though, which probably made this personal for Aaron.
"It's not," Aaron said. Dave was brushing against his shoulder, but Aaron didn't bother to look up or move. He shook his head. "It should be." He frowned. "I want to be ready if they call us in."
Dave laughed. "You're always ready. Same signature as the others? What's the victimology?" He could feel his pulse speeding up at the way Aaron didn't pull away from him. He was walking a very dangerous line, and he knew it--but he couldn't seem to stop.
"White females, late thirties, dark hair, all found with their clothes torn, but no evidence of sexual assault." Hotch turned over a picture of a badly mutilated woman and frowned deeply. "And I'm not always ready. I'm never ready, really. I'm not convinced you can be in this job. I just... work well under pressure."
"You'd have to be, Mister Hotshot Prosecutor," Dave teased. He took the picture out of Aaron's hand and studied it. "Is she posed like this as a forensic countermeasure, or is this some kind of...display?"
"The unsub did that for display. The shredded clothes are always meticulously piled in five different places around the body," Arron said. "Always five."
Dave sighed. "Grand Rapids PD asked for a consult some time ago, right? Why haven't they called us in yet?"
"I don't know." Aaron glanced up at Gideon's office and wondered he'd heard yet. Probably. Nothing got past Agent Gideon.
"Hm." Dave handed the picture back to Aaron and shook his head. "Well, Gideon'll probably take you with him if he gets the call. Lucky you." Dave and Gideon didn't always see eye-to-eye, though they managed to show each other professional respect, most of the time. Still, Aaron knew Dave preferred to work with almost anyone instead of Gideon.
Aaron arched an eyebrow, but didn't respond. He'd learned quickly not to talk too loudly--or too affectionately--about Jason Gideon around Dave. Which was a shame, really, considering Aaron liked Gideon so much. Aaron cleared his throat and sat back in his seat, again ignoring that Dave was so close, and focused back on the files.
Dave snagged a chair from another desk and pulled it over. Before he'd resumed the conversation, though, Jason stuck his head out of his office.
"Hotch." He beckoned. Dave raised his eyebrows in amusement and shoved back out of the way.
Aaron glanced up, then pushed away from the desk, taking the file with him and offering Dave a tiny parting glance. When he got to Gideon's office, he stepped inside--about half way to the desk, a position neither overbearing or timid--and stood, his posture neutral. "I presume you've heard they found another body in Grand Rapids."
"We've got the call," Gideon said, glancing up over the tops of his reading glasses. "We're flying commercial, wheels up in an hour. I want you along, since you did the initial consult with me." He looked back down to his desktop, where he was gathering papers into a folder. "If you think Rossi can do without you for a week or two."
"Of course. I'm reviewing the case files already." Aaron breathed a small laugh and nodded when Gideon continued, appreciating the sentiment even if he didn't necessarily agree. "Dave is more than capable of handling things without me," he said.
Gideon nodded slowly. "Dave's become a good friend, hasn't he?" he murmured, looking over his papers. It would have been a nonchalant question, except for the slight emphasis he placed on Dave's first name.
Aaron's eyebrows inched up, then Aaron forced them down before Gideon looked back up. "Becoming, yes. I suppose you could say that," he replied finally, figuring he'd wait and see what Gideon had to say before drawing an assumption based on Gideon's tone.
Gideon nodded. When he looked up, he had a funny little smile on his face. "I've actually never seen Dave take to someone as easily as he has to you. I'm not sure what to make of it." He stopped speaking, though it looked as though he wanted to say something else.
Hotch's eyes narrowed in thought, but he didn't look away. He just held Gideon's gaze for a moment, trying to discern where this was going, or why it had been brought up. He finally looked away and out the window of Gideon's office. "Sir, I'm not blind to the fact that you and Agent Rossi don't exactly see eye to eye, but I certainly hope you know I would never base my opinion of you on someone else's," he said. "So if there's a problem, I'd prefer it if you just told me," he added, looking back.
Gideon just stared at him for a moment, his expression somewhere between appraising and amused. Finally he laughed. "David Rossi is a fine profiler, even if I think his methods are occasionally...unorthodox..." He shook his head. "Hotch, this is probably none of my business. But I'm concerned that perhaps you don't know Rossi as well as you think you do."
Aaron frowned. "I said 'becoming' friends for a reason," he said, but he felt a little uncomfortable now, like there was some big secret he wasn't in on. "Are you... going to explain what you're talking about, or am I supposed to guess?" He watched Gideon for another moment, and then the corners of his lips curled up in an uncomfortable smile. "Or am I supposed to just wait and be surprised?"
Gideon steepled his fingers for a moment, then took off his glasses and looked directly at Aaron. "You aren't married, but I believe you have a serious girlfriend, is that correct?"
Aaron stood there a minute, trying to catch up, and when he did, he shook his head and laughed. "No-- I mean, yes, I do, but I've heard those rumors about Dave. Dave and Haley pretty much hate each other. I'm not particularly worried," he said, smiling.
Gideon coughed and rubbed his jaw. "That doesn't make me feel any better," he muttered. "Hotch..." He glanced past Aaron, then sighed. "Agent Rossi doesn't always, ah, limit himself to the fairer sex."
The smile slowly slid off Aaron's face, but he felt a little too floored to say anything for a moment. Gideon thought Dave was interested in Aaron? It took a few breaths to recover... only Aaron didn't really recover at all because the only thing he could think to say was, "If there's nothing more, I'll see you on the plane in..." He glanced at the clock. "Forty-five minutes." He managed a smile, one that said he didn't quite buy what Gideon was telling him, but that he was more than willing to drop the subject, if his words hadn't been clear enough.
Gideon shrugged. "Right. See you then." He didn't look away from Aaron.
Aaron held his gaze for a moment. He felt like he should probably say something else, but he finally just nodded and then turned and left the office. When he settled back at his desk--the desk he shared with Dave--he dropped the case file back on it and glanced across the table at Dave. It wasn't possible that Dave was attracted to him. Aaron swallowed and shoved the thought away. "We've got the case. I'm off in forty."
Smiling, Dave looked up from the notes he'd been taking on another case. "Lucky you." He glanced at the calendar tacked on the wall by the desk. "Don't forget to call Haley if you're going to be gone past Friday. I could entertain her, but I don't think either of us would really enjoy it."
Aaron should have laughed, but for a moment he could only think of the assumption he'd made in Gideon's office about what Gideon had been implying, which inevitably lead him back to what Gideon did actually mean. "Yeah, probably not," he murmured.
Dave's brows drew together and he sat back. "Are you okay? Normally you smack me if I badmouth your wife." It wasn't true, or at least it had only happened once, when they were both in a goofy mood after a solving a case and having a few celebratory beers, but Dave had the feeling Aaron wasn't even listening to him.
"No, yeah, I'm fine." Aaron looked back after a moment. "I'm just distracted. And technically admitting you two don't get along isn't the same as badmouthing her. It's just fact," he said, not quite satisfied with his own tone, but ignoring it.
"Right." Dave just looked at him, trying to figure out why things had gone weird in the past fifteen minutes. "Well, good luck in Grand Rapids."
Aaron nodded, and picked up a few files, then pushed from the desk. "Thanks. I need to get my things in order. I'll see you... hopefully soon," he said, and started out of the bullpen.
*****
The case in Grand Rapids had seemed to fall into place so quickly. Every lead seemed to get them somewhere; each witness had more pieces of the puzzle. They tracked their unsub easily. In the final hours, though, things had taken a turn for the worst. And in the final moments, their unsub took both his last victim's life and his own.
Hotch had stood there for a long moment, just staring, his gun still partially raised and all the blood draining from his face. He didn't look away though until a strong hand squeezed his shoulder. He tried to steel himself, but he knew the expression he turned on Gideon was wearier than he wanted it to be. Still, he swallowed hard, holstered his gun, and managed to walk away from the scene.
It was a shock after how well the case had gone, and the ending--death, nothingness, no resolution, no closure, nobody saved--left Hotch feeling inexplicably emptier than he had on all the previous cases. That night he went back to the hotel and didn't sleep, mostly out of choice, because he didn't really want to see what he saw when he closed his eyes.
When he arrived back in Quantico late the following day, it was just to pick up a few of his things. He went straight to his shared desk, sorted through a few stacks until he found what he wanted, and then tucked the papers under his arm. "Hey," he said, finally glancing up at Dave. "I'll see you tomorrow." He started away from the desk.
"Stop." Gideon had called Dave from the hotel the night before and outlined how the case ended. He hadn't needed to tell Dave how Aaron had taken it--Dave had already known how Aaron would take it--but he did.
Gideon had called again from the airport and told Dave they were on their way back to Quantico. Dave had been playing solitaire for an hour waiting for Aaron and Jason to get back from their flight. He'd only swept the cards off the desk and into a drawer when he'd heard the bunker door open.
Dave looked up at Aaron. "I'm not letting you leave alone."
Aaron stopped moving, but didn't turn around at first. He really didn't want other people to feel like he needed to be coddled or taken care of. It was a bad case. They all had bad cases, and he knew that, even if it had been his first really bad case, it wouldn't be his last. He sighed and glanced over his shoulder. "I'm really fine."
"Sure you are. But I need company. Gideon won't drink with me since I put my tie around my head and sang the theme song for Cheers at the top of my lungs in the Quantico bar last year." Dave rolled his eyes. "You're not fine, Aaron, a blind man could see you're not fine. You need scotch and distraction. I can at least provide the former, and if the pool table's free, I'll provide the latter."
Aaron breathed a laugh, but he felt a little too tired to really be amused. "I'll be fine. And I need to go home," he protested.
Dave shook his head. "Fine, you can come home with me if you don't want the Quantico bar. You're not going home alone. Don't make me drag you. I'm an expert on methods of abduction."
Out of the corner of Aaron's eye, he saw Gideon glance back at them as he shuffled into his office. Aaron didn't look back. "Haley's... in Georgia," he remembered. He shook his head. "I don't need a babysitter."
Dave snorted. "Don't argue with me, Hotshot," he said, looping an arm around Aaron's shoulders in a manner that was only loosely removed from a headlock. "My apartment, scotch, you can sleep on the couch. Your wife won't miss you since she's not here."
"A regular slumber party," Aaron deadpanned, but didn't protest anymore; he just let Dave walk him out of the office.
Dave gave Gideon a look over Aaron's shoulder, mostly to let him know Dave hadn't forgotten the last thing he said on the phone: "David, be careful."
Aaron didn't talk much on the drive to Dave's apartment, but Dave didn't really mind. It wasn't a comfortable silence, but he didn't expect anything to be comfortable for Aaron right now. He'd watched a woman murdered in front of him. Who could be comfortable after a thing like that? When they got home, Dave's cat sniffed suspiciously at the cuff of Aaron's pants while Dave took Aaron's bag and dropped it by the end of the couch.
"Scotch or rum?" he asked. "Or vodka, but I won't be responsible for you if you pick the last."
Aaron watched the cat for a moment as it went from sniffing to hopping into his lap and looking at Aaron, purring for no understandable reason. "Whatever you're drinking," he said, staring back at the cat as blankly as the cat was staring at him.
Dave, halfway to the kitchen, nodded and went to them two glasses of scotch. When he came back in, he said, "Shithead, be nice."
Aaron blinked, then turned a confused look on Dave before he realized Dave had to be talking to his cat. "Tell me you didn't seriously name your cat Shithead."
Dave shrugged. "Kay named him Mr. Fluffy. He always looked disgruntled when she called him that. So I call him Shithead." He handed a glass of scotch to Aaron and settled on the couch a couple feet away. "Amazingly, he always answers to it when I have a can of food in my hand."
"You must have a way with animals," Aaron said, his tone ironic. He downed about half his glass in one gulp as the cat formerly known as Mr. Fluffy decided to make Aaron's lap its new resting place.
Dave snorted. "Or something." He took a sip of his scotch. He stared at the beige carpeting, Gideon's voice echoing in his head. David, be careful. He wondered if Gideon had said anything to Aaron about this. There was no question he'd seen it, if he was passing along warnings like that. But be careful of what? Dave sighed and took another sip. "Have you talked to Haley this week?"
"A couple of times. I called last night, but got her voice mail." Aaron finally lifted his hand to stroke the cat gently, its purring growing louder the moment he touched the soft fur. He didn't really want to admit that, when it came to the way this case had gone, he didn't have a clue how to talk to her. Or keep her convinced that this was a job that made him happy.
Aaron was petting Shithead. Dave didn't know if it was some instinct that made people pet animals, or if something about a purring cat insisted on being given affection. He didn't care. He was just glad Shithead hadn't decided to hide under the couch, hissing and growling the entire time Aaron was here.
"Friday night," Dave said. "She have friends she goes out with there?"
Aaron looked up at Dave as he scratched behind the cats ears and smiled softly. "Yeah, that's probably it. She actually had quite a few friends. Much more social than I ever was." Of course she also had more free time, but that was beside the point. Aaron knew that situation was only going to keep going the way it always had.
Dave nodded. "I know how that goes." Another sip, then he reminded himself he was trying not to get as drunk as Aaron tonight. "You didn't leave her a message?"
"No, I did," Aaron said, but didn't say anymore, even when he knew Dave would know that was an obvious avoidance of the implicit question within the question: what did you tell her? He gulped the rest of his drink.
And she didn't call you back? Dave thought. He darted a glance at Aaron, but just said, "Oh." He paused. "What did you say?"
Aaron sighed and shook his head. "That the case was over, I was safe, and that I was going home." He shrugged, then eyed his empty glass. "I'd get up for more, but Shithead might bite me if I move now."
Dave laughed and stood. "Let me." He went to the kitchen and brought the bottle back. "He does seem to like you. Hell of a lot more than he ever liked Kay."
"I'm not going to marry you, if that's what you're implying," Aaron said dryly, and only thought a little too late how that might sound. He held out his glass and hoped Dave would just laugh it off.
Dave laughed again, louder this time, and splashed some scotch into Aaron's glass. "Shithead, bite him," he said, grinning. "That would be an interesting method of choosing my next wife. 'Hey, come here, let me see if Shithead likes you.' First test would be if she actually calls him Shithead."
Aaron chuckled, feeling a little better if only because he was still able to laugh. "I'm not sure you'll get many women with that one. I'd start out with something easier." His stomach was doing strange things as they talked about Dave's wife and Dave getting women. He doesn't always go for the fairer sex, he thought. I've actually never seen Dave take to someone as easily as he has to you, Gideon's voice reminded him. Aaron tried to ignore how comfortable and easy this felt.
"Pity. I like women a little more than I like most men," Dave said. Of course, it wasn't true about Aaron. God, he shouldn't have said that. He wondered again if Gideon had said anything to Aaron.
Aaron grinned. "Just a little?" His stomach lurched a bit as the words just slipped out and his smile went a bit absent. He took another gulp of his drink.
Don't do this, Dave told himself. He shrugged. "Women smell nicer most of the time." It was a non-answer. Maybe Aaron would let it go. Then again, maybe he'd ask if Dave got divorced because he was gay. Dave took a long sip of scotch. He wasn't gay. He just...liked men sometimes.
Aaron nodded. "Yes, they do." He wasn't exactly sure what to say now, so he focused on petting the cat again and drinking a little more.
Dave decided to let that go unanswered. Scotch was easier than explaining. If Aaron wanted to ask, he would ask. Dave would answer. But Gideon had called Dave because Aaron needed company, not because he needed a good hard fuck. And not because he needed to be seduced away from his fiancee. You'd hate yourself later, he told himself. He took a long drink of scotch and stared blankly at the wall.
The room went silent for a while, but it certainly wasn't comfortable. There was obviously something unspoken in the air, and Aaron tried to tell himself it had nothing to do with the very slim chance Dave was attracted to him.
The silence was maybe worse than if he'd tried to explain. Or laugh it off as a joke. But Dave couldn't quite bring himself to laugh it off. It was true, he did like guys sometimes. There was something about Aaron that inspired complete trust. Maybe it was his quiet self-confidence. Maybe it was his integrity. Maybe Dave was just stupid. He took another sip of his scotch and bit back the words he suddenly wanted to say.
Aaron could feel his jaw tensing as he tried to figure out something to say, just something to make the heaviness in the room dissipate. There wasn't anything though, and after a moment, he drew a heavy breath and just said what he was thinking. "Something just sucked all the air out of the room. What just happened?" he asked, turning to look at Dave again and holding his gaze.
"Fragment in the space-time continuum," Dave suggested, then sighed. "Look, I'm sorry if it bothers you. I'm not gay. I do like women, even if Kay and I didn't work out." He shrugged and finished his scotch. "I just like men sometimes." He didn't look over at Aaron. I like you. I like you more than I should. I'm a fucking idiot. He poured himself another glass.
Aaron didn't look away, in spite of the way Dave didn't look at him. Between that and Gideon's assessment of the relationship Dave and Aaron had quickly formed, Aaron was starting to think there might be some truth to the idea that Dave was interested in him. Aaron felt oddly sick, lightheaded, and flattered all at the same time. "I don't care who you sleep with," he said.
Dave glanced over at Aaron, trying to judge how true those words were. He had a feeling Aaron cared more than he was willing to admit; most men didn't like getting hit on by other men. Dave had learned that lesson years ago, after a half-joking suggestion had gotten his nose broken. "It's not like I make a big deal about it. And I do like women." He wasn't sure why he was still defending himself.
Aaron's eyebrows went up. "I believe you," he said, then held out his glass for more scotch even though he was starting to feel a little warm and fuzzy already. When Dave filled his glass, Aaron slouched down on the couch a little and dropped his head back, closing his eyes. Shithead stirred and repositioned himself, and Aaron took another long drink of the amber liquid in his glass.
A grin crept across Dave's face at how Shithead had completely appropriated Aaron as his property. "I am glad my cat likes you, though. Sometimes he bites strangers." He shifted sideways on the couch so he could see Aaron better. "But he seems to have the misapprehension that you're a pushover." God, Aaron was pretty. It occurred to Dave that he'd probably already had too much to drink, considering how strong the temptation was with Aaron, and how weak his own willpower was.
Aaron hummed a small laugh and scratched under the cat's chin. He could feel Dave watching him, even with his eyes closed, and he wasn't sure why it excited him, when it clearly shouldn't. "As long as he keeps his claws in, I don't really care what he does in my lap." He took another sip. He should stop.
"You know, that sort of thing is dangerous to say in this apartment," Dave teased. As soon as the words were out of his mouth he wanted to have them back. This was why he should have stopped drinking at least half a glass ago--he said stupid things that were going to make his partner hate him. Dave had never met anyone who was so damn good at putting up with him--possibly even liking him. He didn't need to alienate Aaron.
Aaron breathed a laugh and opened his eyes, Dave's words sending a weird jolt through him. "Is that why the mention of you not being straight brought our conversation to a halt just a moment ago?" he asked. His tone was casual--of course, he couldn't help that after a few glasses of Scotch--but he wasn't sure he really wanted an answer now that he'd asked the question.
Dave blinked at Aaron, feeling a sudden chill go through him. He was honestly the stupidest man alive. There was no other explanation. You were practically throwing yourself at him, said a voice in the back of his head. Aloud, he just said, "Huh?"
Aaron rolled his eyes and just turned to give Dave a look. "Alcohol doesn't kill brain cells quite this quick."
Dave took a long breath, making himself meet Aaron's gaze, but he didn't say anything.
Aaron looked at Dave, waiting for Dave to say something. He felt oddly disappointed when Dave didn't reply, though he was feeling increasingly guilty for even allowing himself to enjoy the possibility that someone else was attracted to him anyway. Not that he didn't know he was attractive, but it was rare for him to actually like the people that seemed to be attracted to him. He sucked in a breath and looked away. "I didn't know what I could tell her that she'd understand. When I called." He wasn't sure if he was bringing up Haley out of guilt, or drawing attention to the way Dave understood certain things that Haley wouldn't. It was possibly both.
The mention of Haley sent a pang of guilt through Dave. He licked his lips. He didn't like Haley, and he didn't think she really understood Aaron, but he didn't have the right to push her out of Aaron's life. "I don't think you can," he said quietly. He shouldn't present himself as an alternative, as someone who understood what this life was like. Even though he was. "We see things other people can't even dream of. People like her shouldn't understand. We stand between them and the darkness." He paused, then added, "It's why I couldn't let you go home alone."
Aaron nodded. "Thanks," he said softly. "I don't think I could tell her what happened and still convince her that I want to go back to work tomorrow anyway." He laughed softly and took another drink.
"She wouldn't believe you," Dave said. "She'd think you're crazy for wanting to do this. It isn't that you enjoy the work. It's that catching the bad guys is more important than anything." He didn't look away from Aaron; he looked so tired, so worn down. Dave really just wanted to hug him and promise it would get a little easier.
"The justice system is..." Aaron thought for a moment and shook his head, then reached out and nudged Dave's leg with the back of his hand. "I should sleep. I've had too much to drink and I didn't sleep last night at all. I might start saying inappropriate things to your cat."
Dave let out a choked laugh. "He likes it," he said. "And I'd probably pay money to see you that shit-faced." He swallowed and tried to ignore the way Aaron's hand had sent a wave of heat through his entire body. "Hang on. I have blankets."
Aaron nodded. "Thanks," he murmured and rolled a bit to put his glass on a coaster on the end table, accidentally dumping the cat. It flicked his tail and started off across the room haughtily. "Sorry, cat," he mumbled, then rolled back and slouched further on the couch.
Dave wandered back to the bedroom to pull sheets and a blanket out of his closet. He grabbed a pillow off his bed and went back out to the front room. He was amused to find Aaron exactly the way he'd left him. Dave dumped the blankets on his head, then sat down next to him again, maybe just a little closer than he'd been before. "Don't be surprised if you have company in the morning," he said, and yawned.
Aaron didn't move for a moment, and then he dragged the covers down over his face, pulling his hair down to cover his forehead. "You or the cat?" he said, his tone warm. Oh yes, he had drank far too much. He really hoped Dave would laugh.
Oh, God. Dave's mouth went dry mid-yawn. He licked his lips, then shrugged. "Couch isn't big enough for me, too," he said. Aaron couldn't know how much he wanted that. Dave drained his glass again, unable to quite tear his gaze away. He'd never seen Aaron like this before. It was damn sexy.
Aaron hummed softly, then turned his head to look at Dave. Far too much to drink. Haley, he thought. If you were sober, you wouldn't be allowing yourself to do this. If you were sober, and you weren't exhausted, and you didn't need someone who understood what you were dealing with right now... "Sorry," he said frowning. "I shouldn't say things like that."
Dave cleared his throat. Don't. Don't say it. "I don't mind."
Aaron smiled softly. "Okay." Shut up. He nodded and looked away. "Yeah, I should sleep," he said after a moment.
Dave nodded and stood up, his gaze warm on Aaron's face. "Let me know if you need anything," he said, and headed back to his bedroom. He brushed his teeth and pulled on his pajamas, then crawled into bed and tried not to think about the man in the other room. He heard Aaron cough once before he fell into a light sleep.
He woke up a few hours later, his senses alert, his heart thudding in his chest. He wasn't sure what had woken him, but a moment later he heard a low cry from the living room. He sighed and sat up, rubbing a hand over his face. There weren't many reasons for a noise like that, and somehow he didn't think Aaron was jacking off in his front room.
Shithead jumped off the bed and followed him down the hallway. Dave paused, watching Aaron shifting restlessly on the couch. No, he was definitely asleep. Dave shook his head. It was probably past time for this, for that matter.
He approached the couch cautiously, leaving enough room for Aaron to wake violently, and reached a tentative hand to grip Aaron's shoulder. "Aaron!"
There was blood everywhere, but nothing was making sense any more. There was no in and no out... and no end. Aaron hated feeling powerless, and it was biting on his every nerve that he was. And then something grabbed him. Aaron gasped, jerked out of the touch, and ran back into... something soft? He blinked his eyes open, straining to see through the dark.
Dave. The couch. The cat. Aaron let out a low groan and collapsed face first against the cushions, his heart pounding against his ribs. It's fine. Everything's fine. He swallowed hard. His throat was dry. "Sorry," he mumbled. "Go back to bed."
"Not yet," Dave said. He was relieved that Aaron was awake, but he didn't think for a minute that, if Dave went back to bed, Aaron would feel any better. He went to the kitchen and got a glass of water from the tap, then brought it back to Aaron. "Here." He sat on the floor, leaning against the couch, and didn't say anything for a while. Finally, when Aaron's breathing was starting to slow a little, Dave opened his mouth.
"One of my first cases with the BAU was a sexual sadist out in Iowa. He had this place in the woods where he kept his victims, a clearing with a cruciform rack. Shackles for the wrists and ankles. When he was finished with the girls--always girls, they were never older than sixteen--he dismembered them. Except the last one. We were close, he didn't have time. Instead he left her hanging on that cross with a stake shoved through her stomach. She looked so scared..." He trailed off and closed his eyes, rubbed his hands over his face.
"That night was when mine started. I see fourteen-year-old Melinda Sauders, with her long brown hair sticking to her face with her own blood. Fourteen years old. I'm standing in the clearing, and she lifts her head and asks me why I wasn't faster."
Aaron didn't move for a moment, just listening and trying to process what Dave was telling him. Not only had the case left him feeling powerless, but it had left him feeling weak too--weak for not being able to save the last victim, weak for letting it keep him awake now two nights in a row. He finally rolled over on his back when Dave finished. He pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes hard and blew out a gust of air. "How long?"
"They get easier after a while," Dave said. "After I have one, I sit and remind myself of the ones we have helped. List them off by name. It's a trick Jason taught me, actually." He lifted his head and turned to look at Aaron. Once again he was tempted to hug him and promise it would be okay. "It really does get easier."
Aaron sighed. It wasn't exactly what he wanted to hear, but it was honest and better than it could have been. He nodded and then laced his hands over his chest, frowning at the ceiling. "Thanks," he murmured.
Shithead twined around one of Dave's ankles, then jumped up onto the couch by Aaron's head. Dave had to suppress a snort; it was really bad when you were jealous of a cat. "We stand between them and the darkness," he said softly.
Aaron made an amused-annoyed noise at the cat, then picked it up and replaced it in front of his stomach so he didn't have fur in his face. His hand automatically moved to stroke the cat's back. "I know," he said. "I know. I just..." He trailed off, not sure what he meant to say.
"I know," Dave said, his voice quiet. He didn't look at Aaron, but he didn't move, either.
The cat had curled up and started purring against Aaron's chest, and he let his hand rest on it, finally turning to look at Dave. "Thanks," he repeated.
Dave's lips curled faintly. "Hey, I'm your partner. S'what I'm here for." He glanced over at Aaron, not sure how to ask if Aaron wanted to go back to sleep now or wanted company for a while longer.
Aaron didn't look away, but suddenly the memories of everything that had been said between them before he'd fallen asleep hit him when Dave smiled. And Aaron was far too sober now to try to figure out where all of his intrigue and interest in Dave's attraction to him had even come from. Aaron was straight, and would probably be getting married soon. He licked his lips. "What time is it?"
"No clue." Dave squinted across the room at the clock on his VCR. "Three-something. Plenty of time left to sleep, if you think you can."
Aaron drew a deep breath and started to roll onto his back when he remembered the cat, then just stayed where he was. "I don't know," he murmured. He didn't think he was going to sleep well for some time. "I should probably try, though."
Dave nodded. He got to his knees, then rested a hand for a moment on Aaron's blanket-covered ankle. He opened his mouth, but couldn't think of anything to say, so he just nodded again and stood. "Sleep well," he said finally, and went back to bed.
He lay awake until his alarm went off at six.
Part Two
Authors:
innerslytherin and severity_softlyPairing: Hotch/Rossi, and a little Hotch/Haley
Rating: PG for this part, NC-17 overall
Summary: When Aaron Hotchner is new to the BAU, he finds himself working closely with SSA David Rossi--one of the original founders of the department. As their relationship progresses, they realize what they have together is more than friendship...but circumstances keep them from having all that they knew they could have together. Years later, Dave has a second chance, just when Aaron needs a friend the most...
Word count: ~10,000 for this part, ~78,000 overall (NOT a WIP)
Notes: RP format. Mild AU, as we played fast and loose with Hotch's already screwy back story (especially in regards to his work history and the timeline of his marriage to Haley). If you find any glaring errors, feel free to point them out. :)
If you were to ask Aaron Hotchner, he might tell you that saying he knew he was right where he belonged the very moment he walked into the BAU was grossly romanticizing the point. There were worries and apprehensions with every new job, and Haley had hardly been happy with the idea of moving to Virginia or with Aaron leaving SWAT and the Bar Association for the FBI. Still, she'd agreed to join him there soon because she loved him, and she wanted him to be happy. And while Aaron didn't walk into the bullpen absolutely sure this was going to be where his heart would reside for the rest of his career, he had a pretty good inkling that was probably the case the moment he saved his victim.
"You did good work." Dave Rossi wasn't a man who was free with his praise, but he never stinted when he thought it was merited. And from the moment he'd met Aaron Hotchner, he'd been impressed with the man--for a lot of reasons, not just that he was gorgeous and eager. Aaron was passionate about right and wrong, and completely in love with the law. It was a beautiful thing, and his dedication to protecting people was impressive.
Dave dropped his bag on the desk he was now sharing with Aaron and Roy Conover and took the chair. Aaron was the 'rookie', he could stand for a few minutes.
"Thanks," Aaron said. He knew it was ridiculous to feel as good as he did, given the case they'd just come off of, but he knew he looked a little too pleased, even if he wasn't actually smiling. He tilted his head at Dave for a moment, and then dragged a chair over from another unoccupied desk. He knew the type of guy Dave was--even if the men he knew in his previous profession might not have been as crass as David Rossi could be sometimes--and he wasn't entirely sure he liked Dave very much yet, but he was willing to give this a try.
Dave smirked, amused. "Pretty satisfied with yourself, aren't you?" he teased. He shook his head. "Better hope they'll allow our profile as evidence in the courtroom. Not much precedent for that yet." He couldn't help trying to needle Aaron a little; he was so damn eager Dave was surprised the kid hadn't been labelled a 'blue flamer'. Still, he was also damn likeable for some reason.
Aaron arched an eyebrow--it wasn't so much that he was pleased with himself, as it was that it felt good to be on this side of the case--and shifted down in his seat a little. He inclined his head, his expression going a little more serious. "I think there's plenty of evidence to build a strong case, though I've heard Glatzer is already preparing to defend him, so whoever's prosecuting is going to have a battle." He shook his head. The case wasn't yet five hours old, and their unsub already had the best sleazebag attorney Aaron knew of.
Dave nodded. "That can be the frustrating part, catching the unsub while not screwing up the court case afterward." He stretched, then glanced at Aaron. "You called that pretty wife of yours to tell her we're back in town yet?"
Aaron laughed and shook his head. "No. Haley and I aren't married, actually. And she's still tying up loose ends at home before she makes the move." He was sure Dave had just assumed Aaron was already married, given his age. It wasn't something Aaron hadn't heard other people assume a million times over, especially given how long he'd been with Haley. "I'll call her when I get home."
"Not married yet? Someone else'll snap the girl up, especially with the hours you're going to be keeping from now on," Dave said. "Trust me on that," he added, thinking of his ex-wife Kay. She hadn't liked the hours he spent away from home, especially when the end of the Hoover era meant women were moving up in the FBI ranks. Too many pretty women at work, too many hours away from home, and Kay was suddenly spending a lot of time with her tennis coach. Dave hadn't contested the divorce, and she'd been nice enough to leave him the cat.
"For all intents and purposes, it's been a de facto marriage for years, even if Georgia doesn't recognize common law marriages." Aaron shifted and glanced at Dave. "I probably will." Haley wanted to get married anyway, in spite of knowing that Aaron had never been too keen on the idea, and he knew once she was here in Virginia, her insistence was only going to get worse.
Dave raised his eyebrows. "You don't sound exactly thrilled about it," he remarked. He glanced at his files, then at his watch. "Want to grab something to eat, since we've both got empty houses to go back to?"
Aaron shrugged. "Sure," he said, quick to let the topic of marriage drop. Honestly, he wanted to go home and shower, but it never hurt to be friendly, considering he'd be working with Dave now.
"There's a great little bar up north a little ways. I can't remember where you said you'd found a place, but if it isn't out of your way, the burgers are great." Dave could cook, but he didn't do it much. Didn't seem to be much point, since it was just him. Eating out was easier, anyway.
"No. No, it's not out of my way." Aaron was mildly surprised that Dave was offering to go to dinner with him. He heard many things about Agent Rossi already, and none of them were rave reviews of Dave's people skills.
Dave nodded and stood up. "Great. I'm definitely in need of a cold beer. Just follow me."
Dave liked to drive fast, but Aaron didn't seem to have any trouble keeping up. Not that Dave would admit to being impressed by something like that. He wasn't. Really.
When they were settled in a booth at the bar, he stretched his legs out, letting them brush Aaron's lightly. "So what does the Not-Mrs.-Hotchner think of your new career?" he asked.
Aaron shifted slightly at the touch to make room for Dave and shrugged. "She's not thrilled about moving. I don't think she's thrilled about the FBI either." He glanced at their waitress when she brought their beers, and nodded his thanks. "Then again, you're a lot less likely to get shot in the courtroom, so I can see her point."
"Not quite as rewarding to spend your life in the courtroom, either," Dave replied. He took a long sip of beer and mentally classified Aaron as 'mostly straight, but not hopeless'. "Does she have a career?"
Aaron shook his head in agreement, but didn't bother to tell Dave that was exactly the reason Aaron had gone into the FBI. "She's a teacher. High school," he said. "She's finishing out the rest of the semester before she makes the move."
"Makes sense. She must like kids. Got any plans to have some?" Rossi hadn't been ready for kids when Kay was. They might be nice, it was the sort of thing you did, getting married and having kids, but he wasn't sure if he ever wanted any of his own.
"She likes her job," Aaron said, and took a long sip of her beer. "Teenagers and children are a different beast, aren't they?"
"Sure," Dave said. The new guy had some things to learn about avoiding questions and working with profilers. Dave let it drop anyway. "Didn't have any with my first wife," he said. "I wasn't a very good husband. Too many hours away from home." The waitress came back with their food and he thanked her absently.
Aaron nodded, but he wasn't sure he liked the direction this conversation was taking. It felt a little like Dave was warning him about something. He took another drink and dug into his food. "Are you remarried?" Aaron hadn't seen a wedding ring or heard that Dave was married, but it was easier to ask that than address the topic at hand.
"Oh, eventually," Dave said. He shrugged. "There's a cute clerk upstairs, name's Doris. I'm not in any hurry, though." He took a bite of his burger, trying to think about how to get Aaron talking. It was an unspoken rule that you didn't ask about why people wanted to work on serial offenders. They all had reasons, and they were all private about those reasons. It didn't stop Dave from wondering. "So you were the lead prosecutor on that rape case a few years ago. Turner something?"
Hotch glanced up from his food to look at Dave, frowning slightly in thought. After a moment, he licked his lips and nodded. "Lona Turner, yes. The State vs. Sykes. Did you follow the case?" Somehow Hotch didn't think that was the case.
Dave shrugged again. "Read about it after the fact." He glanced over at Aaron. The truth was, he'd read up on his new partner the minute he'd heard rumors the kid might be recruited. "There was talk about you for State Attorney, maybe Attorney General someday. And then you chucked that and went to the Academy, did SWAT out in Seattle for a couple years."
Aaron looked back up at Dave, and after a moment he let a smile seep through his expression. "There was talk of that. It wasn't what I wanted." He shook his head. "You did your homework," he guessed, smiling, then took a bite of his food.
Dave grinned back. "Like to know what I'm getting myself into," he agreed. "Everyone pretty much agrees, you're a hotshot." He laughed. "Hotshot Hotchner."
Aaron laughed and sat back, watching Dave for a moment. David Rossi really wasn't the man Aaron had been expecting him to be. "Is that what they say?" he said, amused. And it wasn't that he didn't already know his reputation had preceded him, but he wasn't planning to ride on it. "I came to the BAU to do a job, not showboat. Aaron's fine."
Dave shook his head. "I didn't say I thought you were here to showboat. You're damn good at your job. And you did a good job on this case." He glanced at Aaron and took a drink of beer as he studied him. "I don't say that sort of thing lightly, Hotshot."
Aaron was still smiling softly. He nodded, not really sure what to say. "Thanks," he said, then paused. "It felt good." He sat there for another minute before he moved again to take another bite of his food, feeling oddly exposed for a moment. He cleared his throat and glanced up again, recovering. "I don't suppose I could veto the use of that nickname, can I?"
Dave laughed. "I'm not the only one who's heard it." He thought about that for a minute. "Can't veto it. Might be able to change it, though...Hotch." He grinned and nudged Aaron's leg under the table.
Aaron laughed, but his eyebrows lifted slightly at the nudge. That was entirely new, in a sense. You didn't exactly get chummy with colleagues when you were a prosecutor. He took another sip of his drink. "I can live with Hotch."
Dave grinned and turned his attention to his burger. He knew the guys he worked with; calling him Aaron wouldn't do anything to stop the Hotshot jokes. But shortening it to Hotch would catch on. And for whatever reason (Dave didn't inspect it too closely) he wanted to make things a little easier on Aaron Hotchner.
*****
To say that Dave Rossi and Haley Brooks hated each other from the moment they met wouldn't be entirely fair, but it was close. She was a pretty young woman, but from the first she seemed to dislike Dave simply because of what he represented--the FBI, the job that had taken Aaron from his successful career as a prosecutor and the promise of an eventual career in politics.
Dave, for his part, was polite and called her ma'am, and made a point to tell her that he'd heard how wonderful she was. In the back of his mind, though, he couldn't help remembering Aaron's apparent lack of excitement about the relationship. Haley had called the BAU and managed to get the number for the police department in Virginia where they were working a case. Dave was impressed that she'd got hold of them, but less impressed that she'd bothered when he found out she wanted Aaron to have lunch with her before she drove back down to Georgia for the week. Dave had invited himself along.
"Is it always like this?" she asked Dave at one point, when Aaron had excused himself to the restroom.
"Pretty much," Dave agreed. "But it's a lot better than it used to be. Few years ago one of our colleagues stretched himself so thin on his caseload that he collapsed in his hotel room. He was lucky to be travelling with a couple of guys."
Her eyes widened and he gave her a reassuring smile. "Don't worry, we won't work Hotch that hard."
She raised her eyebrows. "Hotch?"
Dave shrugged. "Once a nickname gets started, it never dies." He grinned, glancing over Haley's shoulder to see Aaron coming back. He always looked so serious in those dark suits of his, so business-like and reserved. Dave wondered how Haley saw him, if he was always that serious.
Aaron wasn't oblivious to the underpinnings of discord between his two lunch companions. Which was a bit of a shame, considering he was stuck trying to play mediator between the woman he loved and a man he had taken to so quickly upon joining the BAU. Of course, Haley wasn't making Aaron's life any easier at the moment, but Dave wasn't making this lunch any more comfortable either.
Aaron slid back into the booth and gave Haley a warm smile, but almost immediately wondered what Dave must have said because it was plain on her face that she was even less happy now than she had been when he'd left the table. He gave Dave a subtle look, then cleared his throat. "How do you like the school you'll be at?" he asked Haley, because turning the conversation back to her was the safest thing to do, and Dave had just been asking about her job before Aaron left anyway.
Haley smiled and curled her fingers around Aaron's hand. "Fine. Everyone there seems nice. Some of the curriculum requirements are different from Georgia schools, of course. But I'll get used to it. Dave says they're calling you Hotch now."
Aaron laughed softly and glanced at Dave. "Yeah. It was better than the alternative, trust me."
Dave grinned but didn't say anything. He was trying to figure out if Haley was being possessive of Aaron because Dave represented a job she hadn't wanted Aaron to take, or because she somehow knew he had designs on Aaron's affection.
"I'm just glad you had time to have lunch with me." She glanced at Dave, then back at Aaron. "It sounds like you're going to be working a lot."
"I would've thought prosecutors keep long hours, too," Dave remarked innocently.
"They do, but generally speaking, you're able to schedule it." Aaron shifted in his seat and turned his hand in Haley's, giving it a squeeze. He glanced at her. "It may not be as regular, but I'll make time," he said, then shrugged and hid his frown in his coffee cup, hoping he could keep that promise.
"Don't worry, we'll take good care of him for you," Dave said. He grinned and excused himself.
Haley turned to watch him walk to the restroom. "I don't like him."
"I've noticed," Aaron said immediately. "Why?" He had a feeling he knew the answer, and that she would avoid the truth.
She shrugged. "He's just...cocky. Sure of himself." She frowned at him. "Hotch?"
Aaron turned to look at her, and for a moment he wasn't sure what to say. He was starting to get a little upset, but he he reminded himself that this was all going to pass. It was just the stress of moving. It wasn't her fault. "Yes. Hotch." He forced himself not to ask why that bothered her too. He knew it was because it was apparent he was already fitting in at the BAU. "Since when is sure of yourself a bad thing?" He gave her hand another squeeze and tried on a lopsided, affectionate smile. "You've always liked it before."
Haley rolled her eyes. "I like it on you. It's sexy on you." She leaned up and kissed him quickly. "He's just--" She frowned and finally blurted, "He acts like he's entitled to part of you."
That actually surprised a laugh out of Hotch. "Haley, this isn't a competition. You have me, and this job isn't going to take that away," he assured, then leaned in and kissed her again. "It's going to be fine."
Haley was frowning at him when he pulled away. "If you're just going to laugh at me, maybe you should go back to work," she said.
Dave had been approaching the table again when he saw Hotch lean in and kiss Haley. He had a feeling this wasn't a good time to interrupt. He paused, then changed directions to go up to the front counter. "I was wondering if I could get three coffees to go," he said, and waited while they filled his order.
Aaron saw Dave coming back out of the corner of his eye, but didn't look away from Haley. "I'm not laughing at you," he said, his smile fading but not slipping off. "But I should go back to work anyway."
Dave slid back into his seat and placed the coffee cups in front of them. "I thought we could all use another cup for the road," he said, smiling at Haley. He wasn't sure he liked her--wasn't sure this relationship with her was really what Aaron wanted--but he was determined to be polite.
"Thanks," Aaron said, picking up his cup and slipping out of the booth. He didn't let go of Haley's hand. He just gave her a gentle tug and waited for her to follow.
Haley forced a smile. "That was nice," she said, following Aaron.
"It was very good to meet you," Dave said as they walked out. "Aaron talks about you a lot." He was looking forward to getting back to the case. He'd quickly gotten used to working with Aaron; they made a good team. It was unsettling to have Haley 'intruding' on their partnership.
"Likewise," Haley replied.
Aaron cleared his throat and gave Dave a little nod that said he'd meet Dave at the car. He turned and took Haley's other hand when Dave walked away. "I'll see you at home tonight," he murmured.
"No, you won't," she said. "Aaron, I'm going back to Georgia now. Did you listen to anything I said?"
Aaron grimaced and shook his head. "Sorry. Sorry. I know." It had slipped his mind after having to sit 'between' her and Dave all lunch. He kissed her again in a last ditch effort to make her feel better about this lunch. "I'll see you next Sunday, then."
Haley sighed and hugged him. "I love you, Aaron," she said, her voice quiet.
"I love you too," he said, then gave her a squeeze before releasing her with a smile. He waited for her to turn before he started towards the car Dave was waiting in, then he got inside and drew his seatbelt across himself, not saying anything.
Dave started the car and pulled out of the lot behind Haley. After a while he cleared his throat. "She's very pretty."
"Yes, she is." Aaron looked sideways at Dave, then turned back to the road. "What were you talking about while I was away from the table?"
Dave shrugged and kept his eyes on the road. "She just asked if the job is always like this, us on the road all this time and whatnot." He glanced at Aaron briefly. "I couldn't lie to her."
"I'm sure she appreciated your honesty," Aaron said, which was possibly a passive aggressive reply, but it slipped before Aaron could stop it. That didn't usually happen; he started to wonder when he'd gotten that comfortable with Dave.
Dave raised his eyebrows. "I seriously doubt she appreciated anything about me," he said. "I'm sorry for it; I always try to get along with my partner's wives." Oops, that little dig had sort of slipped out.
Aaron glanced at Dave, frowning. "She's just settling in." Great. And now he was making excuses. He held a sigh and looked back at the road.
Dave shrugged. "Hey, as long as you're happy, man." Of course, he wasn't a hundred percent convinced Aaron was happy, but he'd give it the benefit of the doubt for now.
"I am," Aaron said. He'd be happier if the people in his life could be happy for him, but that might have been asking too much in some cases.
Dave nodded. "Good. That's what matters. Just hang on to that happiness." It doesn't last.
The rest of the drive back to the police station was silent.
*****
Dave smiled at Doris as she joked about one of the SACs, but his gaze was drawn to Aaron, who was striding into the BAU bunker, a tense look on his face. This is getting bad, Dave told himself. Over the past few months, he'd gotten to the point where he was more concerned, more invested--more attracted--to Aaron than any of the cute girls who expressed interest. "Excuse me," he murmured, looking back at Doris and touching his fingers briefly to her shoulder. He smiled, but it was absent, his attention already caught by Aaron's odd entrance.
He headed for the desk they shared, unsurprised to find Aaron searching the desk for something.
"What's wrong?"
Aaron didn't look up. A case had just come up, one from a killer they'd all assumed disappeared. Aaron had done some consulting on the case with Gideon when he was a brand new agent, but no one had been able to find the guy before. The case had never officially been handed over to the BAU, however. Until now. They just had a brand new body in Michigan with the exact same MO.
Aaron found the case file that was buried under newer, more active investigations, and dropped it on the desk in front of Dave. "Grand Rapids Killer. There's a new body. That's what's wrong." He took the file back before Dave could even look at it and started thumbing through its contents.
"I didn't think that was an official case." Dave moved to stand behind Aaron and look over his shoulder at the file. He knew Aaron and Jason had done some consulting on it, though, which probably made this personal for Aaron.
"It's not," Aaron said. Dave was brushing against his shoulder, but Aaron didn't bother to look up or move. He shook his head. "It should be." He frowned. "I want to be ready if they call us in."
Dave laughed. "You're always ready. Same signature as the others? What's the victimology?" He could feel his pulse speeding up at the way Aaron didn't pull away from him. He was walking a very dangerous line, and he knew it--but he couldn't seem to stop.
"White females, late thirties, dark hair, all found with their clothes torn, but no evidence of sexual assault." Hotch turned over a picture of a badly mutilated woman and frowned deeply. "And I'm not always ready. I'm never ready, really. I'm not convinced you can be in this job. I just... work well under pressure."
"You'd have to be, Mister Hotshot Prosecutor," Dave teased. He took the picture out of Aaron's hand and studied it. "Is she posed like this as a forensic countermeasure, or is this some kind of...display?"
"The unsub did that for display. The shredded clothes are always meticulously piled in five different places around the body," Arron said. "Always five."
Dave sighed. "Grand Rapids PD asked for a consult some time ago, right? Why haven't they called us in yet?"
"I don't know." Aaron glanced up at Gideon's office and wondered he'd heard yet. Probably. Nothing got past Agent Gideon.
"Hm." Dave handed the picture back to Aaron and shook his head. "Well, Gideon'll probably take you with him if he gets the call. Lucky you." Dave and Gideon didn't always see eye-to-eye, though they managed to show each other professional respect, most of the time. Still, Aaron knew Dave preferred to work with almost anyone instead of Gideon.
Aaron arched an eyebrow, but didn't respond. He'd learned quickly not to talk too loudly--or too affectionately--about Jason Gideon around Dave. Which was a shame, really, considering Aaron liked Gideon so much. Aaron cleared his throat and sat back in his seat, again ignoring that Dave was so close, and focused back on the files.
Dave snagged a chair from another desk and pulled it over. Before he'd resumed the conversation, though, Jason stuck his head out of his office.
"Hotch." He beckoned. Dave raised his eyebrows in amusement and shoved back out of the way.
Aaron glanced up, then pushed away from the desk, taking the file with him and offering Dave a tiny parting glance. When he got to Gideon's office, he stepped inside--about half way to the desk, a position neither overbearing or timid--and stood, his posture neutral. "I presume you've heard they found another body in Grand Rapids."
"We've got the call," Gideon said, glancing up over the tops of his reading glasses. "We're flying commercial, wheels up in an hour. I want you along, since you did the initial consult with me." He looked back down to his desktop, where he was gathering papers into a folder. "If you think Rossi can do without you for a week or two."
"Of course. I'm reviewing the case files already." Aaron breathed a small laugh and nodded when Gideon continued, appreciating the sentiment even if he didn't necessarily agree. "Dave is more than capable of handling things without me," he said.
Gideon nodded slowly. "Dave's become a good friend, hasn't he?" he murmured, looking over his papers. It would have been a nonchalant question, except for the slight emphasis he placed on Dave's first name.
Aaron's eyebrows inched up, then Aaron forced them down before Gideon looked back up. "Becoming, yes. I suppose you could say that," he replied finally, figuring he'd wait and see what Gideon had to say before drawing an assumption based on Gideon's tone.
Gideon nodded. When he looked up, he had a funny little smile on his face. "I've actually never seen Dave take to someone as easily as he has to you. I'm not sure what to make of it." He stopped speaking, though it looked as though he wanted to say something else.
Hotch's eyes narrowed in thought, but he didn't look away. He just held Gideon's gaze for a moment, trying to discern where this was going, or why it had been brought up. He finally looked away and out the window of Gideon's office. "Sir, I'm not blind to the fact that you and Agent Rossi don't exactly see eye to eye, but I certainly hope you know I would never base my opinion of you on someone else's," he said. "So if there's a problem, I'd prefer it if you just told me," he added, looking back.
Gideon just stared at him for a moment, his expression somewhere between appraising and amused. Finally he laughed. "David Rossi is a fine profiler, even if I think his methods are occasionally...unorthodox..." He shook his head. "Hotch, this is probably none of my business. But I'm concerned that perhaps you don't know Rossi as well as you think you do."
Aaron frowned. "I said 'becoming' friends for a reason," he said, but he felt a little uncomfortable now, like there was some big secret he wasn't in on. "Are you... going to explain what you're talking about, or am I supposed to guess?" He watched Gideon for another moment, and then the corners of his lips curled up in an uncomfortable smile. "Or am I supposed to just wait and be surprised?"
Gideon steepled his fingers for a moment, then took off his glasses and looked directly at Aaron. "You aren't married, but I believe you have a serious girlfriend, is that correct?"
Aaron stood there a minute, trying to catch up, and when he did, he shook his head and laughed. "No-- I mean, yes, I do, but I've heard those rumors about Dave. Dave and Haley pretty much hate each other. I'm not particularly worried," he said, smiling.
Gideon coughed and rubbed his jaw. "That doesn't make me feel any better," he muttered. "Hotch..." He glanced past Aaron, then sighed. "Agent Rossi doesn't always, ah, limit himself to the fairer sex."
The smile slowly slid off Aaron's face, but he felt a little too floored to say anything for a moment. Gideon thought Dave was interested in Aaron? It took a few breaths to recover... only Aaron didn't really recover at all because the only thing he could think to say was, "If there's nothing more, I'll see you on the plane in..." He glanced at the clock. "Forty-five minutes." He managed a smile, one that said he didn't quite buy what Gideon was telling him, but that he was more than willing to drop the subject, if his words hadn't been clear enough.
Gideon shrugged. "Right. See you then." He didn't look away from Aaron.
Aaron held his gaze for a moment. He felt like he should probably say something else, but he finally just nodded and then turned and left the office. When he settled back at his desk--the desk he shared with Dave--he dropped the case file back on it and glanced across the table at Dave. It wasn't possible that Dave was attracted to him. Aaron swallowed and shoved the thought away. "We've got the case. I'm off in forty."
Smiling, Dave looked up from the notes he'd been taking on another case. "Lucky you." He glanced at the calendar tacked on the wall by the desk. "Don't forget to call Haley if you're going to be gone past Friday. I could entertain her, but I don't think either of us would really enjoy it."
Aaron should have laughed, but for a moment he could only think of the assumption he'd made in Gideon's office about what Gideon had been implying, which inevitably lead him back to what Gideon did actually mean. "Yeah, probably not," he murmured.
Dave's brows drew together and he sat back. "Are you okay? Normally you smack me if I badmouth your wife." It wasn't true, or at least it had only happened once, when they were both in a goofy mood after a solving a case and having a few celebratory beers, but Dave had the feeling Aaron wasn't even listening to him.
"No, yeah, I'm fine." Aaron looked back after a moment. "I'm just distracted. And technically admitting you two don't get along isn't the same as badmouthing her. It's just fact," he said, not quite satisfied with his own tone, but ignoring it.
"Right." Dave just looked at him, trying to figure out why things had gone weird in the past fifteen minutes. "Well, good luck in Grand Rapids."
Aaron nodded, and picked up a few files, then pushed from the desk. "Thanks. I need to get my things in order. I'll see you... hopefully soon," he said, and started out of the bullpen.
*****
The case in Grand Rapids had seemed to fall into place so quickly. Every lead seemed to get them somewhere; each witness had more pieces of the puzzle. They tracked their unsub easily. In the final hours, though, things had taken a turn for the worst. And in the final moments, their unsub took both his last victim's life and his own.
Hotch had stood there for a long moment, just staring, his gun still partially raised and all the blood draining from his face. He didn't look away though until a strong hand squeezed his shoulder. He tried to steel himself, but he knew the expression he turned on Gideon was wearier than he wanted it to be. Still, he swallowed hard, holstered his gun, and managed to walk away from the scene.
It was a shock after how well the case had gone, and the ending--death, nothingness, no resolution, no closure, nobody saved--left Hotch feeling inexplicably emptier than he had on all the previous cases. That night he went back to the hotel and didn't sleep, mostly out of choice, because he didn't really want to see what he saw when he closed his eyes.
When he arrived back in Quantico late the following day, it was just to pick up a few of his things. He went straight to his shared desk, sorted through a few stacks until he found what he wanted, and then tucked the papers under his arm. "Hey," he said, finally glancing up at Dave. "I'll see you tomorrow." He started away from the desk.
"Stop." Gideon had called Dave from the hotel the night before and outlined how the case ended. He hadn't needed to tell Dave how Aaron had taken it--Dave had already known how Aaron would take it--but he did.
Gideon had called again from the airport and told Dave they were on their way back to Quantico. Dave had been playing solitaire for an hour waiting for Aaron and Jason to get back from their flight. He'd only swept the cards off the desk and into a drawer when he'd heard the bunker door open.
Dave looked up at Aaron. "I'm not letting you leave alone."
Aaron stopped moving, but didn't turn around at first. He really didn't want other people to feel like he needed to be coddled or taken care of. It was a bad case. They all had bad cases, and he knew that, even if it had been his first really bad case, it wouldn't be his last. He sighed and glanced over his shoulder. "I'm really fine."
"Sure you are. But I need company. Gideon won't drink with me since I put my tie around my head and sang the theme song for Cheers at the top of my lungs in the Quantico bar last year." Dave rolled his eyes. "You're not fine, Aaron, a blind man could see you're not fine. You need scotch and distraction. I can at least provide the former, and if the pool table's free, I'll provide the latter."
Aaron breathed a laugh, but he felt a little too tired to really be amused. "I'll be fine. And I need to go home," he protested.
Dave shook his head. "Fine, you can come home with me if you don't want the Quantico bar. You're not going home alone. Don't make me drag you. I'm an expert on methods of abduction."
Out of the corner of Aaron's eye, he saw Gideon glance back at them as he shuffled into his office. Aaron didn't look back. "Haley's... in Georgia," he remembered. He shook his head. "I don't need a babysitter."
Dave snorted. "Don't argue with me, Hotshot," he said, looping an arm around Aaron's shoulders in a manner that was only loosely removed from a headlock. "My apartment, scotch, you can sleep on the couch. Your wife won't miss you since she's not here."
"A regular slumber party," Aaron deadpanned, but didn't protest anymore; he just let Dave walk him out of the office.
Dave gave Gideon a look over Aaron's shoulder, mostly to let him know Dave hadn't forgotten the last thing he said on the phone: "David, be careful."
Aaron didn't talk much on the drive to Dave's apartment, but Dave didn't really mind. It wasn't a comfortable silence, but he didn't expect anything to be comfortable for Aaron right now. He'd watched a woman murdered in front of him. Who could be comfortable after a thing like that? When they got home, Dave's cat sniffed suspiciously at the cuff of Aaron's pants while Dave took Aaron's bag and dropped it by the end of the couch.
"Scotch or rum?" he asked. "Or vodka, but I won't be responsible for you if you pick the last."
Aaron watched the cat for a moment as it went from sniffing to hopping into his lap and looking at Aaron, purring for no understandable reason. "Whatever you're drinking," he said, staring back at the cat as blankly as the cat was staring at him.
Dave, halfway to the kitchen, nodded and went to them two glasses of scotch. When he came back in, he said, "Shithead, be nice."
Aaron blinked, then turned a confused look on Dave before he realized Dave had to be talking to his cat. "Tell me you didn't seriously name your cat Shithead."
Dave shrugged. "Kay named him Mr. Fluffy. He always looked disgruntled when she called him that. So I call him Shithead." He handed a glass of scotch to Aaron and settled on the couch a couple feet away. "Amazingly, he always answers to it when I have a can of food in my hand."
"You must have a way with animals," Aaron said, his tone ironic. He downed about half his glass in one gulp as the cat formerly known as Mr. Fluffy decided to make Aaron's lap its new resting place.
Dave snorted. "Or something." He took a sip of his scotch. He stared at the beige carpeting, Gideon's voice echoing in his head. David, be careful. He wondered if Gideon had said anything to Aaron about this. There was no question he'd seen it, if he was passing along warnings like that. But be careful of what? Dave sighed and took another sip. "Have you talked to Haley this week?"
"A couple of times. I called last night, but got her voice mail." Aaron finally lifted his hand to stroke the cat gently, its purring growing louder the moment he touched the soft fur. He didn't really want to admit that, when it came to the way this case had gone, he didn't have a clue how to talk to her. Or keep her convinced that this was a job that made him happy.
Aaron was petting Shithead. Dave didn't know if it was some instinct that made people pet animals, or if something about a purring cat insisted on being given affection. He didn't care. He was just glad Shithead hadn't decided to hide under the couch, hissing and growling the entire time Aaron was here.
"Friday night," Dave said. "She have friends she goes out with there?"
Aaron looked up at Dave as he scratched behind the cats ears and smiled softly. "Yeah, that's probably it. She actually had quite a few friends. Much more social than I ever was." Of course she also had more free time, but that was beside the point. Aaron knew that situation was only going to keep going the way it always had.
Dave nodded. "I know how that goes." Another sip, then he reminded himself he was trying not to get as drunk as Aaron tonight. "You didn't leave her a message?"
"No, I did," Aaron said, but didn't say anymore, even when he knew Dave would know that was an obvious avoidance of the implicit question within the question: what did you tell her? He gulped the rest of his drink.
And she didn't call you back? Dave thought. He darted a glance at Aaron, but just said, "Oh." He paused. "What did you say?"
Aaron sighed and shook his head. "That the case was over, I was safe, and that I was going home." He shrugged, then eyed his empty glass. "I'd get up for more, but Shithead might bite me if I move now."
Dave laughed and stood. "Let me." He went to the kitchen and brought the bottle back. "He does seem to like you. Hell of a lot more than he ever liked Kay."
"I'm not going to marry you, if that's what you're implying," Aaron said dryly, and only thought a little too late how that might sound. He held out his glass and hoped Dave would just laugh it off.
Dave laughed again, louder this time, and splashed some scotch into Aaron's glass. "Shithead, bite him," he said, grinning. "That would be an interesting method of choosing my next wife. 'Hey, come here, let me see if Shithead likes you.' First test would be if she actually calls him Shithead."
Aaron chuckled, feeling a little better if only because he was still able to laugh. "I'm not sure you'll get many women with that one. I'd start out with something easier." His stomach was doing strange things as they talked about Dave's wife and Dave getting women. He doesn't always go for the fairer sex, he thought. I've actually never seen Dave take to someone as easily as he has to you, Gideon's voice reminded him. Aaron tried to ignore how comfortable and easy this felt.
"Pity. I like women a little more than I like most men," Dave said. Of course, it wasn't true about Aaron. God, he shouldn't have said that. He wondered again if Gideon had said anything to Aaron.
Aaron grinned. "Just a little?" His stomach lurched a bit as the words just slipped out and his smile went a bit absent. He took another gulp of his drink.
Don't do this, Dave told himself. He shrugged. "Women smell nicer most of the time." It was a non-answer. Maybe Aaron would let it go. Then again, maybe he'd ask if Dave got divorced because he was gay. Dave took a long sip of scotch. He wasn't gay. He just...liked men sometimes.
Aaron nodded. "Yes, they do." He wasn't exactly sure what to say now, so he focused on petting the cat again and drinking a little more.
Dave decided to let that go unanswered. Scotch was easier than explaining. If Aaron wanted to ask, he would ask. Dave would answer. But Gideon had called Dave because Aaron needed company, not because he needed a good hard fuck. And not because he needed to be seduced away from his fiancee. You'd hate yourself later, he told himself. He took a long drink of scotch and stared blankly at the wall.
The room went silent for a while, but it certainly wasn't comfortable. There was obviously something unspoken in the air, and Aaron tried to tell himself it had nothing to do with the very slim chance Dave was attracted to him.
The silence was maybe worse than if he'd tried to explain. Or laugh it off as a joke. But Dave couldn't quite bring himself to laugh it off. It was true, he did like guys sometimes. There was something about Aaron that inspired complete trust. Maybe it was his quiet self-confidence. Maybe it was his integrity. Maybe Dave was just stupid. He took another sip of his scotch and bit back the words he suddenly wanted to say.
Aaron could feel his jaw tensing as he tried to figure out something to say, just something to make the heaviness in the room dissipate. There wasn't anything though, and after a moment, he drew a heavy breath and just said what he was thinking. "Something just sucked all the air out of the room. What just happened?" he asked, turning to look at Dave again and holding his gaze.
"Fragment in the space-time continuum," Dave suggested, then sighed. "Look, I'm sorry if it bothers you. I'm not gay. I do like women, even if Kay and I didn't work out." He shrugged and finished his scotch. "I just like men sometimes." He didn't look over at Aaron. I like you. I like you more than I should. I'm a fucking idiot. He poured himself another glass.
Aaron didn't look away, in spite of the way Dave didn't look at him. Between that and Gideon's assessment of the relationship Dave and Aaron had quickly formed, Aaron was starting to think there might be some truth to the idea that Dave was interested in him. Aaron felt oddly sick, lightheaded, and flattered all at the same time. "I don't care who you sleep with," he said.
Dave glanced over at Aaron, trying to judge how true those words were. He had a feeling Aaron cared more than he was willing to admit; most men didn't like getting hit on by other men. Dave had learned that lesson years ago, after a half-joking suggestion had gotten his nose broken. "It's not like I make a big deal about it. And I do like women." He wasn't sure why he was still defending himself.
Aaron's eyebrows went up. "I believe you," he said, then held out his glass for more scotch even though he was starting to feel a little warm and fuzzy already. When Dave filled his glass, Aaron slouched down on the couch a little and dropped his head back, closing his eyes. Shithead stirred and repositioned himself, and Aaron took another long drink of the amber liquid in his glass.
A grin crept across Dave's face at how Shithead had completely appropriated Aaron as his property. "I am glad my cat likes you, though. Sometimes he bites strangers." He shifted sideways on the couch so he could see Aaron better. "But he seems to have the misapprehension that you're a pushover." God, Aaron was pretty. It occurred to Dave that he'd probably already had too much to drink, considering how strong the temptation was with Aaron, and how weak his own willpower was.
Aaron hummed a small laugh and scratched under the cat's chin. He could feel Dave watching him, even with his eyes closed, and he wasn't sure why it excited him, when it clearly shouldn't. "As long as he keeps his claws in, I don't really care what he does in my lap." He took another sip. He should stop.
"You know, that sort of thing is dangerous to say in this apartment," Dave teased. As soon as the words were out of his mouth he wanted to have them back. This was why he should have stopped drinking at least half a glass ago--he said stupid things that were going to make his partner hate him. Dave had never met anyone who was so damn good at putting up with him--possibly even liking him. He didn't need to alienate Aaron.
Aaron breathed a laugh and opened his eyes, Dave's words sending a weird jolt through him. "Is that why the mention of you not being straight brought our conversation to a halt just a moment ago?" he asked. His tone was casual--of course, he couldn't help that after a few glasses of Scotch--but he wasn't sure he really wanted an answer now that he'd asked the question.
Dave blinked at Aaron, feeling a sudden chill go through him. He was honestly the stupidest man alive. There was no other explanation. You were practically throwing yourself at him, said a voice in the back of his head. Aloud, he just said, "Huh?"
Aaron rolled his eyes and just turned to give Dave a look. "Alcohol doesn't kill brain cells quite this quick."
Dave took a long breath, making himself meet Aaron's gaze, but he didn't say anything.
Aaron looked at Dave, waiting for Dave to say something. He felt oddly disappointed when Dave didn't reply, though he was feeling increasingly guilty for even allowing himself to enjoy the possibility that someone else was attracted to him anyway. Not that he didn't know he was attractive, but it was rare for him to actually like the people that seemed to be attracted to him. He sucked in a breath and looked away. "I didn't know what I could tell her that she'd understand. When I called." He wasn't sure if he was bringing up Haley out of guilt, or drawing attention to the way Dave understood certain things that Haley wouldn't. It was possibly both.
The mention of Haley sent a pang of guilt through Dave. He licked his lips. He didn't like Haley, and he didn't think she really understood Aaron, but he didn't have the right to push her out of Aaron's life. "I don't think you can," he said quietly. He shouldn't present himself as an alternative, as someone who understood what this life was like. Even though he was. "We see things other people can't even dream of. People like her shouldn't understand. We stand between them and the darkness." He paused, then added, "It's why I couldn't let you go home alone."
Aaron nodded. "Thanks," he said softly. "I don't think I could tell her what happened and still convince her that I want to go back to work tomorrow anyway." He laughed softly and took another drink.
"She wouldn't believe you," Dave said. "She'd think you're crazy for wanting to do this. It isn't that you enjoy the work. It's that catching the bad guys is more important than anything." He didn't look away from Aaron; he looked so tired, so worn down. Dave really just wanted to hug him and promise it would get a little easier.
"The justice system is..." Aaron thought for a moment and shook his head, then reached out and nudged Dave's leg with the back of his hand. "I should sleep. I've had too much to drink and I didn't sleep last night at all. I might start saying inappropriate things to your cat."
Dave let out a choked laugh. "He likes it," he said. "And I'd probably pay money to see you that shit-faced." He swallowed and tried to ignore the way Aaron's hand had sent a wave of heat through his entire body. "Hang on. I have blankets."
Aaron nodded. "Thanks," he murmured and rolled a bit to put his glass on a coaster on the end table, accidentally dumping the cat. It flicked his tail and started off across the room haughtily. "Sorry, cat," he mumbled, then rolled back and slouched further on the couch.
Dave wandered back to the bedroom to pull sheets and a blanket out of his closet. He grabbed a pillow off his bed and went back out to the front room. He was amused to find Aaron exactly the way he'd left him. Dave dumped the blankets on his head, then sat down next to him again, maybe just a little closer than he'd been before. "Don't be surprised if you have company in the morning," he said, and yawned.
Aaron didn't move for a moment, and then he dragged the covers down over his face, pulling his hair down to cover his forehead. "You or the cat?" he said, his tone warm. Oh yes, he had drank far too much. He really hoped Dave would laugh.
Oh, God. Dave's mouth went dry mid-yawn. He licked his lips, then shrugged. "Couch isn't big enough for me, too," he said. Aaron couldn't know how much he wanted that. Dave drained his glass again, unable to quite tear his gaze away. He'd never seen Aaron like this before. It was damn sexy.
Aaron hummed softly, then turned his head to look at Dave. Far too much to drink. Haley, he thought. If you were sober, you wouldn't be allowing yourself to do this. If you were sober, and you weren't exhausted, and you didn't need someone who understood what you were dealing with right now... "Sorry," he said frowning. "I shouldn't say things like that."
Dave cleared his throat. Don't. Don't say it. "I don't mind."
Aaron smiled softly. "Okay." Shut up. He nodded and looked away. "Yeah, I should sleep," he said after a moment.
Dave nodded and stood up, his gaze warm on Aaron's face. "Let me know if you need anything," he said, and headed back to his bedroom. He brushed his teeth and pulled on his pajamas, then crawled into bed and tried not to think about the man in the other room. He heard Aaron cough once before he fell into a light sleep.
He woke up a few hours later, his senses alert, his heart thudding in his chest. He wasn't sure what had woken him, but a moment later he heard a low cry from the living room. He sighed and sat up, rubbing a hand over his face. There weren't many reasons for a noise like that, and somehow he didn't think Aaron was jacking off in his front room.
Shithead jumped off the bed and followed him down the hallway. Dave paused, watching Aaron shifting restlessly on the couch. No, he was definitely asleep. Dave shook his head. It was probably past time for this, for that matter.
He approached the couch cautiously, leaving enough room for Aaron to wake violently, and reached a tentative hand to grip Aaron's shoulder. "Aaron!"
There was blood everywhere, but nothing was making sense any more. There was no in and no out... and no end. Aaron hated feeling powerless, and it was biting on his every nerve that he was. And then something grabbed him. Aaron gasped, jerked out of the touch, and ran back into... something soft? He blinked his eyes open, straining to see through the dark.
Dave. The couch. The cat. Aaron let out a low groan and collapsed face first against the cushions, his heart pounding against his ribs. It's fine. Everything's fine. He swallowed hard. His throat was dry. "Sorry," he mumbled. "Go back to bed."
"Not yet," Dave said. He was relieved that Aaron was awake, but he didn't think for a minute that, if Dave went back to bed, Aaron would feel any better. He went to the kitchen and got a glass of water from the tap, then brought it back to Aaron. "Here." He sat on the floor, leaning against the couch, and didn't say anything for a while. Finally, when Aaron's breathing was starting to slow a little, Dave opened his mouth.
"One of my first cases with the BAU was a sexual sadist out in Iowa. He had this place in the woods where he kept his victims, a clearing with a cruciform rack. Shackles for the wrists and ankles. When he was finished with the girls--always girls, they were never older than sixteen--he dismembered them. Except the last one. We were close, he didn't have time. Instead he left her hanging on that cross with a stake shoved through her stomach. She looked so scared..." He trailed off and closed his eyes, rubbed his hands over his face.
"That night was when mine started. I see fourteen-year-old Melinda Sauders, with her long brown hair sticking to her face with her own blood. Fourteen years old. I'm standing in the clearing, and she lifts her head and asks me why I wasn't faster."
Aaron didn't move for a moment, just listening and trying to process what Dave was telling him. Not only had the case left him feeling powerless, but it had left him feeling weak too--weak for not being able to save the last victim, weak for letting it keep him awake now two nights in a row. He finally rolled over on his back when Dave finished. He pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes hard and blew out a gust of air. "How long?"
"They get easier after a while," Dave said. "After I have one, I sit and remind myself of the ones we have helped. List them off by name. It's a trick Jason taught me, actually." He lifted his head and turned to look at Aaron. Once again he was tempted to hug him and promise it would be okay. "It really does get easier."
Aaron sighed. It wasn't exactly what he wanted to hear, but it was honest and better than it could have been. He nodded and then laced his hands over his chest, frowning at the ceiling. "Thanks," he murmured.
Shithead twined around one of Dave's ankles, then jumped up onto the couch by Aaron's head. Dave had to suppress a snort; it was really bad when you were jealous of a cat. "We stand between them and the darkness," he said softly.
Aaron made an amused-annoyed noise at the cat, then picked it up and replaced it in front of his stomach so he didn't have fur in his face. His hand automatically moved to stroke the cat's back. "I know," he said. "I know. I just..." He trailed off, not sure what he meant to say.
"I know," Dave said, his voice quiet. He didn't look at Aaron, but he didn't move, either.
The cat had curled up and started purring against Aaron's chest, and he let his hand rest on it, finally turning to look at Dave. "Thanks," he repeated.
Dave's lips curled faintly. "Hey, I'm your partner. S'what I'm here for." He glanced over at Aaron, not sure how to ask if Aaron wanted to go back to sleep now or wanted company for a while longer.
Aaron didn't look away, but suddenly the memories of everything that had been said between them before he'd fallen asleep hit him when Dave smiled. And Aaron was far too sober now to try to figure out where all of his intrigue and interest in Dave's attraction to him had even come from. Aaron was straight, and would probably be getting married soon. He licked his lips. "What time is it?"
"No clue." Dave squinted across the room at the clock on his VCR. "Three-something. Plenty of time left to sleep, if you think you can."
Aaron drew a deep breath and started to roll onto his back when he remembered the cat, then just stayed where he was. "I don't know," he murmured. He didn't think he was going to sleep well for some time. "I should probably try, though."
Dave nodded. He got to his knees, then rested a hand for a moment on Aaron's blanket-covered ankle. He opened his mouth, but couldn't think of anything to say, so he just nodded again and stood. "Sleep well," he said finally, and went back to bed.
He lay awake until his alarm went off at six.
Part Two
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Date: 2008-11-11 11:48 pm (UTC)I like the rapport Dave and Hotch have, especially as Rossi doesn't often get along so well with people. I felt a bit bad for Hotch having to referee the Dave-Hayley and Dave-Gideon relationships sometimes, but he seemed to do ok. Not sure Gideon made the right call by warning Aaron about Dave's possible feelings. I guess it depends what he was trying to do with the information, though I don't suppose he expected the almost flirting when Dave took him home, at least not on Hotch's part. Personally, I'm glad Hotch has got someone who he can talk to about what happened and be understood.
I'm looking forward to the next part and seeing how things progress between them.
Laura.
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Date: 2008-11-12 03:45 am (UTC)Thanks!
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Date: 2008-11-12 10:56 pm (UTC)I'm glad you're enjoying this!
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Date: 2008-11-12 11:44 pm (UTC)LOL But mothers are also HARDER on their children than fathers are. Rossi is compassionate and peace-keeping when it's needed, but he's also hard on his "kids". Hotch can do all of that when necessary, but he's more lenient and 'let them make their own mistakes' like a dad. :P
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Date: 2008-11-12 05:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-12 06:26 am (UTC)I'm so glad you liked it! Thanks!
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Date: 2008-11-12 10:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-12 09:46 am (UTC)Thanks for sharing, I'm looking forward to the next part.
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Date: 2008-11-12 05:22 pm (UTC)Thank you very much!
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Date: 2008-11-12 10:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-12 12:47 pm (UTC)I think you capture Hotch and Rossi's personality perfectly, and even when my own personal canon is not too keen on Hotch/Rossi while Hotch is still with Haley... Well, can't say rookie!Hotch + Rossi is not something I find incredibly interesting. Um. Yeah. Love. LOVE.
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Date: 2008-11-12 05:27 pm (UTC)Thank you, dear! It always make me smile when you comment! :)
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Date: 2008-11-12 10:52 pm (UTC)Adultery is actually something that really bothers me, so as Severity mentioned, we got a bit creative here. ^_~
I'm so glad you're liking this!
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Date: 2008-11-12 07:23 pm (UTC)I love your Hotch/Rossi, so me loving this comes as no surprise. I love Rookie Hotch, mostly cause he doesn't FEEL like a newbie, just new to the players and eager. And you even threw in Gideon into the mix- I gotta admit, Hotch/Gideon was my original love (till he left quite jerkily and Rossi came and hugged Hotch in his first episode!) so I love seeing Gideon and Hotch together and the interesting dynamics between Rossi and Gideon. We already know Haley is jealous of Hotch's work/partners (The ït's your wife" aboutt Gideon back in S1)so I can understand her and Rossi being cold around each other.
Long ramble short, I'm enjoying this immensely and just wanted to say, as a cat-lover I smiled when Hotch got along with Rossi's cat. Can't wait to read more.
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Date: 2008-11-12 10:51 pm (UTC)Have you seen this adorable picture of Joe and a kitty? *G* I can't remember who gave it to me, but I definitely think this is Shithead. ;)
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Date: 2008-11-14 12:40 pm (UTC)(till he left quite jerkily and Rossi came and hugged Hotch in his first episode!)
I KNOW! Oh, how I love Rossi!
Glad you liked it! Thanks!
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Date: 2008-11-13 12:45 pm (UTC)As I do with all of your stories, I won't start reading until you have it all posted! But I'm so excited for this. :)
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Date: 2008-11-14 06:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-14 12:41 pm (UTC)I'm honestly not squicked by adultery; it's more that Hotch is SO loyal, I can't imagine him doing it
unlike that bitch ex-wife of his*cough*Thank you very much!
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Date: 2008-11-18 02:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-14 12:50 am (UTC)I do hope you'll post more soon! (y'all's is helping to keep me sane while i'm writing Criminal Minds fic for NaNoWriMo!)
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Date: 2008-11-14 12:42 pm (UTC)Glad you liked it! Thanks!
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Date: 2008-11-19 12:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-16 09:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-18 08:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-19 12:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-18 02:36 pm (UTC)*scampers off to read the second part*
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Date: 2008-11-18 03:40 pm (UTC)And I adore this icon so much! I wish I could find more pictures of the two of them together. If you come across any, let me know!
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Date: 2008-11-18 08:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-19 12:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-28 01:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-28 01:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-28 01:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-01-03 04:08 am (UTC)I'm so glad you're enjoying this. And I promise to you, there will NEVER be Gideon-sex in ANY of our fics, whether co-written or separate. We are both highly squicked by the idea of Gideon-sex.
For me, it was highly enjoyable exploring Hotch as the 'new guy'. Not someone who didn't know what he was doing, because obviously he does, but someone who is being mentored in, and showing that side of Rossi, and exploring the slow shifting of 'power/authority' (for lack of a better, gentler word) between them.
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Date: 2009-01-04 03:44 am (UTC)And the cat is fantastic. I would be jealous of him too. :D
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Date: 2009-01-04 03:49 am (UTC)*cough* I mean. I'm glad you're enjoying this! :D
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Date: 2009-01-04 11:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-12-09 08:04 pm (UTC)Loved that line!
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Date: 2010-12-11 02:54 am (UTC)